I’m on break between finishing Term 2 and starting Term 3 so it’s spring cleaning time. I’m organizing all my papers and filing, etc. It’s actually a really nice thing to do today, despite the beautiful weather outside.
In the process of cleaning out my filing cabinet and reorganizing, I found the letter I wrote to myself when I first realized I had to change my life on that birthday trip to Sea Ranch in 2011. I had a hard conversation with my family and there were tears. Afterward, Lia handed me a piece of paper, titled it IT’S OKAY. and told me to write whatever I needed to sustain me through this mess. It is the most badass letter ever. I love it. I had no idea I still needed it. Thanks, past self. You always know what to say.
I can’t put all of it here, but this part I was particularly stunned by:
The world changes. People you love make mistakes, but they will always love you. Love them. Forgive them. Forgive yourself. Fail. Fail a lot. No, seriously, you don’t know failure. Find out what it is. Seek it out. It doesn’t mean you’re stupid or not talented. You are smart, but not about everything. Live a little. Make that list. The one at the top. And ask for help. Stop procrastinating and make the next thing happen, whatever it is. Because you are worth it and it is time.
A year later, I started school. And I am so much happier. So much more myself now.